Why Do I Block My Own Magic?

Why is it that I kind of block myself with my own projects?

I know I have amazing ideas (or at least, they seem amazing in my head, ha!). And I know that if I put in the real work, I could make something special out of them.

I know I need to focus and bring these ideas into existence. I could do something really good, but I have these voices in my head that keep telling me I am wasting my time. They tell me I need to focus on "real money" and stop searching for other things... but why can’t I do both?

I am 41 years old, and you would think that by now I would have dealt with all my insecurities. But the truth is, I haven’t worked through all of them. There is this nagging voice that asks: “Who would want to read you or listen to you?”

It is just weird. I feel like there are always "other things" that are more important to do than following through on what I really want. I know I need to break my mind free from the fear of judgment or being criticized. But those fears only live in my mind.

Maybe the problem isn't the ideas. Maybe it’s the discipline.

I don’t think I have ever started and truly followed through on a personal project. Why do I feel it is not good enough or not worthy?

100% what I need is discipline. I need a calendar, a schedule—something that forces me to work and to follow that dream I have.

I mean, I started, so that is a plus! But I need consistency. I need to follow through. I need to keep myself motivated, not by thinking about failure, but by thinking of the good that could come out of it.

There are so many tools nowadays to bring ideas to life, but the secret ingredients are consistency and discipline. You need a schedule to put in the real time, the hard work. People always say, "If you really want something, you have to work for it." And they are right.

Also, I believe it is important to be your own cheerleader because not everyone will support you. Not everyone will say, "Well done, that is a great idea!" I believe it is easier for people to either ignore you or tell you what could go wrong.

So yes, maybe this all could be a waste of time... or maybe not. But at least I will find out by trying and not giving up.